An Appreciation of A Rod (No Homo)
A Rod is the best worst guy ever, and I was always pretty sure he was gay. (What straight 30-yr-old man do you know who likes Madonna, would invite Jeter for sleepovers, sunbathes in just jean short shortz in the Ramble, or has frosted tips?) But ever since US Weekly broke the Madg-Rod story, a parade of strippers, strip clubs, swinger clubs, and one night stands have come to light. A Rod sounds like a world class scode. Now I have my doubts. Is A Rod really hetero?
Meanwhile, dude is hitting 320 with 18 jacks and 50 RBI despite missing like a month of the season. Or, he’s gonna win MVP—again. All while in the middle of the biggest sports-tabloid divorce ever.
As a Red Sox fan, I’m predisposed to hate A Rod. But since Yankee fans have never really taken to him and he’s never really beat the Sox, I secretly enjoy watching him play. Last year I caught a dozen games during his legendary first half when every other at bat he hit a homer. I hate to say it, but it was f–king awesome. Bad haircut and all, the guy is the best I’ve ever seen besides Bonds*.
US Weekly just released more reportage:
“He kept smiling, acting as if he was a little kid,” the dinner companion tells Us Weekly in its latest issue, on newsstands now. “He told me it was Madonna,” A-Rod’s friend says. “I was shocked.” The highest-paid player in baseball then “proceeded to say he was in love with her,” the pal tells Us. “I thought he was kidding, but he wasn’t.” By February, the 32-year-old slugger had upped the ante. “He said, ‘She’s my f–king soul mate, dude.’”
SUBSCRIBE TO RSS
