Okay. Hello. I still can’t tell if unorganized, unplanned travel into foreign land is serendipitous and adventurous or if it’s stressful and hopeless. Maybe a healthy mix of both.
Left U.A.E. on Wednesday around 4pm…but before that, went to the Dubai equivalent of the DMV and Mike had to get a U.A.E. drivers license - which took four hours, two different DMV locations, an eye examination in a grocery store, and three cab rides. Fuck that. So we finally hit the road south to Oman. Getting out of U.A.E. was a breeze, but after a three hour wait in line for customs, countless amounts of line cheaters (the Scottish were the worst - they were fuckin jerks - my heritage has some patience issues), we finally got into Oman after driving on Oman’s version of the German Autobahn - drivers going 200km per hour wasn’t a rare sighting. Also, Oman has probably twelve cops per one person - or sure seemed like it. But I have never seen this many cops. Not even in Times Square, or around Ground Zero. FINALLY made it to the capital of Oman - Muscat. Or Muskat, which ever you like. Lots of names here have many spellings. You know we have like Colour vs. Color. Or Shoppe vs. Shop. Here it’s Muscat vs. Mukcat. Or Tire vs. Tyre. Not Tyre Banks - Ali’s Flat Tyre Fix. Understand?
Sit down to eat at this restaurant and their menu featured some very special meals: “hotdog club sandwich”, “lambs burger”, “hotdog burger”, “chicken lollipop”, “shrimps pizza”, and just about every other nasty combo of sandwich that you could imagine. I asked some Swedes who walked out of McDonalds where they’re staying in Muscat - to get an idea of where to go - and this is where the madness starts - finally end up lost, like really lost. Like deep in the hills lost. Drove around for three hours, popping into every hotel - had no road map of Oman, no GPS, every hotel we could find, “Sorry, no rooms.” Okay, so we figure we’re gonna have to sleep in the car. Fine. That sucks, but there was nowhere else to go when you’re tired and having brain pain. We finally get into the old part of Muscat and these kids yell out, “Are you lost? You need help?” Then after figuring out what we were saying, they point to a building with a little hotel sign. Al Mina Hotel. Yes! 200 Dirham later, I’m in the sketchiest hotel room on the planet, without hookers. Cigarette burn holes on the sheets. Phone numbers written on the wall closest to Mike’s bed. A bath towel that was comparable to highly abrasive sandpaper. Now imagine the shower. If I could have paid $5000 to levitate, I would have. So anyways, slept decently there in this hotel for about 4 hours then woke up and walked around the souk in the morning hunting for Turkish coffee. But damn, what a beautiful city Muscat is. Almost nothing modern about it, in comparison to Dubai, which is a relatively new country (35 some odd years old and big big big everything). And by far the friendliest people I’ve encountered on this trip. Everyone says, “Welcome to Oman” with a smile and a hand shake. People bought us tea, coca-colas, water, Pear juice, talked about New York - just really nice folks. We left Muscat around 4pm and headed north back into U.A.E. Got to Fujairah, which is a super nice mix of beach and mountains. Very Southern California looking - actually central coast area. Oh, on top of it being a weekend (weekends here are Thursday and Friday) it’s Mohammed’s Bday which means, good luck getting a hotel. NOT A SINGLE HOTEL available. None. Happy Birthday Mohammed! After pleading with every hotel reception worker and getting denied, we drove another two hours back to Dubai to the villa. The owner of the villa that we had rented for two weeks, Marie, had thought that since we were “going to Oman”, it would be a good idea to rent our room out to someone else while we were gone - so we got boned. So guess where Mike and I slept? In the freaking backyard, on the ground, next to the pool, with one blanket per person. I woke up at 5am to loud prayer from the Mosque around the corner and the fucking roosters. And to the flies at 6am. And to a girl wanting to swim at 8am but saw two super tall, white dudes laying on the ground at a nice villa poolside. I wonder what she thought…fuck it.
Gonna stick around Dubai until Sunday and then leave mid-day for Musandam, Oman. Fjords and shit…can’t wait.
Go to Oman. But make sure it’s not Mohammed’s Birthday when you’re there.
Chicken Lollipops and Shrimps Pizza - Are you fucking kidding me?
SUBSCRIBE TO RSS
